


Reconciliation

by RainbowLookingGlass



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: BPD Kent Parson, Borderline Personality Disorder, Healthy Communication, Make-up, Mature Conversations
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-11
Updated: 2017-02-11
Packaged: 2018-09-23 14:12:20
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9660737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainbowLookingGlass/pseuds/RainbowLookingGlass
Summary: Kent never thought he would hear from Jack again. But when he does, he's more than willing to use everything he's learned over the past several months to try and fix what's been long broken.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I firmly believe that if Kent got some help, he would be able to express himself healthily to Jack. So I wrote a bit of a fix-it, because I want my boys to be happy and to show that even someone who's done awful things in the past can learn and grow.

Kent was sitting on his sofa, watching tape and absently stroking Kit, when his phone started vibrating on the table. He paused the tape and checked it, seeing it wasn’t a number already in his phone. He wouldn’t normally bother to answer, but honestly, he needed a break anyhow. He picked up and swiped the screen to accept. “Hello?” He heard a sharp breath on the other end.

 

“Kenny,” the other person whispered, making Kent’s blood run cold. He knew that voice anywhere.

 

“Zimms,” he murmured back, shocked. He’d deleted Jack’s number after what he’d done at that party. He hadn’t expected to ever hear from him again.

 

“Hey. Listen I know this is kind of out of nowhere-- are you busy? Can you talk for a bit?” Kent glanced at the TV screen.

 

“I have some time. What’s up?” he asked, trying desperately for casual but knowing he was probably falling hopelessly short. 

 

“Just… Listen to me for a minute, ok? I mean, I just want to talk and say some things, and I’d appreciate it if you would just listen to me. Then I’ll let you talk and I’ll listen to anything you have to say. I just… I think we need this,” Jack asked, sounding slightly shaky. Kent would do anything to put him at ease.

 

“Of course. Talk to me.” Jack took a deep breath, sounding even shakier than before. Kent’s heart clenched, but he stayed quiet like he promised. 

 

“Okay. Okay. What… what you did at the kegster wasn’t okay. It took me by surprise, and I didn’t know how to cope with that. And trying to influence my life like that, making assumptions about me, wasn’t okay. And the things you said to me weren’t okay. And I don’t want you to do that ever again. I know you’re hurting Kenny, and I know a lot of that is my fault. I just don’t want you to take that out on me when I can’t give you exactly what I want. That’s not fair.” He paused, seeming to expect Kent to interrupt. And Kent desperately wanted to, but he remembered what his therapist said about stopping and looking at a situation before acting. And he was pretty sure if he interrupted and tried to defend himself, he wasn’t getting another chance.

 

“I would like an apology for that,” Jack continued,” I think that’s fair. But that’s not all I wanted to say. Like I said, I know that a lot of your suffering was my fault. I fucked up in a lot of ways, for a really long time. I know I did, and I know it hurt you. And I’m really, genuinely sorry for that. And whatever you want to say now, I want to hear.” It was Kent’s turn to take a shaky breath. He hadn’t expected this, hadn’t prepared. But he could do this.

 

“First of all, I’m sorry,” he told Jack. “I know what I did at the party was fucked up. I shouldn’t have cornered you into anything, and the things I said when you turned me down were cruel. I’m sorry, and I’ll try to never, ever do that again to you, and if I do I’ll apologize immediately and work to fix it. I promise.” His mind was going a mile a minute and he was confused and not sure what to say. This was too overwhelming, too much. He wanted to hang up on Jack, or tell him yeah, he had fucked up when they were younger. Force him to realize he’d nearly killed Kent as well when he’d overdosed. Snap and make Jack feel as bad as Kent himself had. But he’d done that before. He knew where that got him. He remembered what his therapist said, when he got like this. Stop, take a step back, process so you can be effective. He could do that.

 

“Listen, I want to finish this, and I promise we will. It’s just a lot all at once, and I need a minute to think. Can I call you back in like half an hour?” He asked, feeling guilty about making Jack wait. But it was what he needed.

 

“Of course. Call me when you feel able, send me a text if you need more than half an hour so I don’t worry, eh? Thanks, Kenny. Really.” They said their goodbyes and hung up. Kent took a minute to just breath, counting in for four, out for seven. When he felt calm enough, he picked up his phone again, calling his therapist.

 

“Hey,” Chris said gently on the other end. “How are you doing?” Kent had to think for a second on how to answer that.

 

“I’m… okay,” he finally decided on. “Do you remember Jack?”

 

“Of course. What about him?” Chris asked. 

 

“He called me. He wanted to talk, and for me to listen, and said I could talk after. Of course I said yes. Basically what he said boils down to that I fucked up in December, and he wanted an apology. Which I expected. But then he also said that he’s done a lot wrong too, and that he’s caused me a lot of pain too, and that he’s sorry. Then it was my turn, and I apologized sincerely immediately but like… It was so much. And I wanted to just make him feel bad for the shit he did to me but like, that’s also not what I want? I need help figuring out how to tell him he fucked up without like… making him super angry, you know? So I told him I needed to think and I’d call back in half an hour, then called you.” Kent felt ridiculous, needing help with this. He felt like he should be able to handle it, but Chris had also told him over and over that there was nothing wrong with needing help. That Chris was there to help him out so, someday, Kent wouldn’t need help navigating this type of shit. Chris hummed a bit, clearly thinking.

 

“First, I’m glad you called. This sounds like a really difficult situation for you, and you’ve also been incredibly effective so far. I’m proud of you,” he said sincerely. Kent felt his heart swell with pride. He never got tired of hearing praise. “This is the perfect situation for what we were working on last week. Do you remember the skill?” Kent affirmed that he did, going off to find his worksheet and a notebook and pen to write in. He was going to do this right.

 

“Hello?” Jack answered the phone, sounding anxious. Kent wondered who was more scared right then.

 

“Hey. So, yeah. I want my turn,” Kent said. When Jack agreed, he continued. “What happened when we were younger, you putting so much pressure on me to help you, then abandoning me after the-the overdose… It terrified me. Before games I was always scared for you, and after losses even more so. When your parents told me you didn’t want to talk to me, I felt abandoned and terrified and heart broken. It really, really hurt me. I know you apologized, but I want to know that you understand that. And I’d really appreciate it if you would be clear with me from now on. If this is our last time talking, okay. If you want to try to rebuild a relationship, I’d like that. But I want to be clear, and I want to know what you’re thinking and feeling so I know where we stand. It’d mean a lot to me,” his voice wobbled a bit at the finish, but overall he was proud of himself. He'd stuck to the script well, and sounded confident and in control. The difference listening to his therapist made was incredible. He was amazed sometimes at how far he'd come in the better part of a year. 

 

“I'm sorry I did all that to you. Really, genuinely, I was never trying to hurt you. I wasn't always aware of what I was doing to you. Thank you for telling me. And I can absolutely be more clear in the future. I don't think I'm ready to jump straight into the kind of friendship we used to have, but I want to be friendly. Talk sometimes, hang out when we're in each other's area. We can try to rebuild, you know?” Jack asked, sounding calmer than he had all night. 

 

“Yeah, that sounds super reasonable. I'd like that, we can see how it goes. There's a lot we need to learn about each other now. And really, I am sorry for all the shit I did to you when we were kids. It was… fucked,” Kent finished uncertainly. Luckily Jack just laughed a bit. 

 

“A lot about our childhoods were fucked. And, euh… look, I know it's none of my business, but you are hurting Kenny, and just, therapy has been so good for me, you know? I think it'd be best for you and us if maybe you looked into it,” Jack suggested, sounding more hesitant than he had all night. Kent smirked, even though he knew Jack couldn't see him. 

 

“Bit late there, Zimms. After my little meltdown at the kegster I was, well, a wreck. One of the guys, you know Troy? He kinda called me out. I thought about it and wasn't thrilled with the idea at first, but I kinda felt like I had nothing to lose. One of the assistant GMs is great with this shit and helped me find Chris. I've been working with him since January, so like 9 months now? At first I had to go in three times a week and Skype him when I was on roadies. Now we're at once a week and it's… good. Really good. I got lucky. After like three months he told me he thinks I have borderline personality disorder and at first I was pissed, like the crazy ex girlfriend disorder? But he helped me understand it more and, well, it fucking fits, and makes sense, and we've been doing this dialectical behavioral therapy shit since and it fucking words when I do it. Hell, when I hung up with you I called him to help me figure out what to say to you. Which I hope you don't mind. He doesn't know your last name, and even if he put two and two together, confidentiality is a thing and he's a really good guy anyhow--”

 

“Kenny,” Jack interrupted him gently. “I don't mind at all. I'm really proud of you, actually. Treatment is hard to start, and hard to stick with. I talked to my therapist about this conversation, too. I'm glad you found someone so good for you.” He cleared his throat nervously. “There's actually something else I wanted to tell you. I uh, I'm seeing someone. Do you remember Bittle? Short blonde winger.” Kent's eyes widened, and he coughed a bit in surprise. 

 

“Fuck, yeah, the speedy little one. I took a selfie with him. Cute,” he paused, then barked a laugh. “Holy shit, Zimms, you have a type.” Kent nearly held his breath, worried that the chirp was overstepping the bounds of this fragile friendship, but Jack just chuckled. 

 

“Yeah, I guess I do. You didn't meet Camilla. Took her to school events a couple times. Maybe 5’8”, tennis player, blonde, outgoing. It's… a pattern,” Jack admitted. Kent couldn't help but grin.

 

“So, Bittle. I'm really happy for you. Does he, uh… know? About us?” 

 

“Yeah, I told him a couple months ago. He was… less than pleased with you at first. But the more we talked about it, the more he understood. He's still not thrilled with what you've said, but he understands and is okay with us being friends. He actually encouraged this, he thought it’d be good for both of us to talk. I think he'll be more okay with us being friends when I tell him about this went. Is there anything you don't want me to tell him?” Kent had to think about it. A mixture of jealousy and guilt was tearing at his gut, telling him he'd messed with their relationship, a relationship that part of Kent didn't even want to exist. But he breathed through it, reminded himself of what he wanted and what was good for him. He could be effective. 

 

“Nah, I don't mind. If you trust him, I trust him. Actually, I'm kinda seeing someone too. There's this new PR dude, Gavin. It's not super serious but we go out and shit, and we have a lot of fun. I think it could go somewhere. I'll tell Troy the bare bones of this if you don't mind, and maybe Gavin eventually.”

 

“That's fine, I don't mind. I'm happy for you, too. You deserve something good, Kenny,” Jack told him so sincerely Kent almost wanted to cry. “And listen. It's my first season with the NHL, and off-season has gone well and preseason so far too, and I know I have my dad and the other guys. Just, if I ever get nervous or need advice…”

 

“Call me. Or text, whatever. Like, I can't be your keeper like in juniors or anything…”

 

“No, no of course not. I'd never expect that from you again. I have other support too, just, you know, occasional advice or whatever. You've already been through all this, you know? And of course if there's ever anything I can do for you, feel free to call. We're gonna be okay,” Jack reassured him. 

 

“Yeah, we are,” Kent agreed. “Listen, I have a date with Gavin tonight and I need to get ready. I think I'm gonna ask him to be exclusive. We'll talk soon, yeah?”

 

“Yeah, for sure. Good luck, have a good time. And thanks, Kenny. I'm happy for you, and proud of you.” Kent felt tear well up in his eyes. He never thought he'd get to hear that from Jack again. 

 

“Thanks, Zimms. You too.” They said their goodbyes and hung up. Kent felt lighter than he had in years as he got in the shower. He never realized his life could feel this good, but he was so glad he'd managed to get here. 

**Author's Note:**

> My tumblr is thesegayhockeynerds.tumblr.com if you wanna say hi!


End file.
